Walking Blindly

 I thought I would join the ranks of the "higher ups" of Blogger and make myself a custom signature. I've had a thing for birds lately and I have no idea why. I actually hate real birds. There are two apartments in our building who have real birds and every time I walk past and hear them squawking, I shake my head and wonder...why?! Annoying, not cute, not cuddly, dirty, etc. But look at the cute little birdy on my signature! There are birds on my layout so I thought I would follow in that theme.

I saw a baby room that this lady posted on a blog that I read that I just fell in love with, and it has birds. Of course, the mural on the wall was hand painted but I just love it. I'm all for decorating a baby room that transitions with the child as they become, well... not a baby. So a room like that would still work when the little girl becomes 5 or even 10. (If you haven't caught on, the words "baby room" is a link to the blog I was referring to)

Now that I am done with my bird/baby rant, I will continue. I feel like this time in my life is called "Patiently Waiting." I am not one that is good with patience. We basically have zero plan for our future as of right now. We have general "ideas" and different places we could go, but we haven't really felt lead any certain way as of yet. Phil has his second interview with a big company tomorrow so if he gets that job it will definitely cement us here to the US. But if he doesn't get it, then there is a good chance we will leave.

It's just so hard being in this in between stage! So much uncertainty. Strangely, there is peace. I really trust that God will open the doors that need to be open, and shut the ones that need to be shut. If the time comes and we really do decide to do missions in Africa, that will require a whole new mindset, and trust on levels I've never needed before.

I knew when I married Phil that we would one day do overseas missions so I've been trying to prepare myself and my heart for that, but I almost feel like there is no way to really prepare. There is so much fear for a woman to leave her home, and live in a foreign place. If and when that time comes, the only real option is to trust that God will keep us safe and guide our steps.

So tomorrow and the next few weeks will really determine a lot as far as where our lives are headed. USA, Africa, Youth Group, Babies, College. I do know that we are headed towards a life with God because as we walk blindly, we follow the sound of his voice. 

P.S. I can't believe it's already May!
P.S.S. My birthday is in 14 days!
P.S.S.S. Phil graduates on FRIDAY!